Did I ever tell you the one about the Gremlin in my hospital room?

Okay, first off, I hated the movie Gremlins. I was a little kid when it came out and I saw it. (Actually I looked it up and it came out the year I was born, so it is hard to pinpoint when my fear of it actually started - can you become afraid of a movie from the womb?). I still haven't fully recovered from the nightmares I had when I was a child. I probably just need to go on and watch it and realize how stupid it is that I don't like it. (I have been telling that to myself for at least three years, we even own the dvd, but nope, still not watching it.)

Now onto the serious business. There is a gremlin in my hospital room. Oh, tell me I'm crazy, go ahead and try. He likes to mess with my ability to sleep. See, when I got here Tuesday night, my room was a normal temperature. I was super tired from being up at 1 am that morning, so I went to sleep at like 8:30 pm. Probably around 10:45 pm, the gremlin arrived and figured out how to turn my thermostat to a temperature that I can only describe as "Satan's Winter Vacation in Death Valley". I promptly was awake at 11 pm. After turning down the thermostat, I was able to fall asleep a few hours later. The gremlin then waited a couple hours and did it again. And then I was awake. Luckily, my third shift nurse is some sort of saint of hot, sweaty, pregnant ladies and obtained a fan for me. She also turned my thermostat down low enough that the pipes should have frozen in my bathroom. And I had a great, cool day in my new abode.

Skip forward some hours and I went to bed last night and my room was FREEZING. So cold, in fact, that I almost asked for an additional blanket. It was perfect, oh so perfect. Then that little jerk of a gremlin showed up while I was sleeping and jacked with something. I don't know why he hates me and doesn't want me to sleep, but this just will not do. This is actually the second time I have been up tonight because of the heat. The first time I messed with the fan to make it move air more efficiently and I checked the thermostat and it is set where it was yesterday. I think the gremlin has figured out how to get into the heating system and boost it like Tim Taylor on Home Improvement.

As I have not watched the movie since I was a child (and my memories are just gremlins eating my brains - not actually part of the movie or so I've heard), I am unsure if there is a solution to this. Dan did make me watch a scene a couple of months ago with a blender, but I think I first have to catch him and he only comes out when I am comfortably asleep.

If you have experience in destroying gremlins, please send your resume to:

The Crazy Lady
Mother and Baby Department
University of Iowa

There is an immediate opening and I will hire on the spot.